You: Swallow bitch! There's people starvin' in Africa.
Stranger: i will slap your face with my dick and never call you again
You: Skull fuck u sai?
Stranger: u ever got your asshole licked by a fat guy in a trench coat?
You: That's happening right now!
Stranger: sick dawg
You: How did you know? o.o
Stranger: im there
Stranger: tweeting about it
You: Oh. OH there you are.
You: Hi!
Stranger: on my cellllllll phone
Stranger: u black/
Stranger: >
Stranger: ?
Stranger: does your mother sew?
You: When the lights are out and it's midnight with no moon out, yes.
Stranger: boom! get her to sew that!
Stranger: when does the narwhal bacon
Stranger: ?
You: I met a fat chick and I fucked her in an elevator.
You: ...
You: My friend talked to you once.
Stranger: nah not me
Stranger: im not the only one
You: Stranger: When does the narwhal bacon?
You: You're crazy.
You: You're all crazy.
Stranger: IM FUCKING MAD
Stranger: FAGGOT
You: D:
Stranger: /r/spacedicks
You: Why are you mad at me
You: why are dicks in space
You: why don't I use question marks
You: why don't you kill yourself
Stranger:
www.reddit.com/r/spacedicks/Stranger: I cant
Stranger: then i cant annoy people on omegle
You: you're not annoying me
You: you're INFURIATING ME
You: I JUST WANNA CAP A BITCH NOW
Stranger: :]
You: You're good at your job and deserve a promotion
You: unfortunately the economy is in the shitter so we have to kill you
You: goodbye
Stranger: :[
You have disconnected.
Stranger: haha that wasnt me
Stranger: but thats hilarious
You: Do you want to become a zombie?
Stranger: do you wanna be dead
You: I can't die, I'm a zombie.
You: Zombies don't die.
You: They go to Hell to regroup.
Stranger: dombies zont zie
You: Icee what you did there
Stranger: ice
Stranger: ice
Stranger: baby
You: brb I'm gonna fap.
You: Okay I'm done.
Stranger: fap it up
Stranger: oh shit!
Stranger: new record
You: Wait I have to clean up my mess.
Stranger: BALLIN!!!
You: Got some semen on my keyboard.
Stranger: dust off cant handle that
Stranger: you got any semen in your mouth
You: Yeah I know, I'll just get my sex slave to lick it off.
Stranger: go snowball it to your friend
You: I will do that.
You: Thanks. (:
Stranger: lulz
Stranger: !
Stranger:
Stranger: omgg
Stranger: lyke
You: Ommg
Stranger: omgggggg!~
You: ooooooooooomg!
Stranger: <3 8======D
You: Hearty dick, u sai
Stranger: pee pee ^
Stranger: i sai sir!
You: You must have a small dick
You: When I put my finger up against the screen...
Stranger: you must have a vag the size of russia space station
Stranger: unircorn DICK!
You: I do, how did you know?
Stranger: cuz im russia
Stranger: like...
Stranger: the actual country
You: In soviet Russia, vaginas fuck YOU.
Stranger: in soviet me. i fuck vodka drunk bitch hoes
Stranger: then take em out for a steak dinner
You: That sounds awesome.
Stranger: i wanna ball you up. and put you in my vagina
You: Let's do it.
Stranger: and everytime you move ill know its you cuz your little hair will tickle the inside of me
You: *balls self up*
Stranger: im getchu!!!!!
Stranger: here cums the vagina train
Stranger: YUM YUm
You: MOMMY NOT AGAIN!
Stranger: seriously you wanna know a fact?
Stranger: you can google this if you want
Stranger: ....
You: Yes.
Stranger: when u licking out a girls vajayjay. your actually eating her blood plasma
Stranger: yum
Stranger: BOOM!
You:
i262.photobucket.com/albums/ii95/RiserGlen2/Reactions/BatmanD.jpgStranger: TIL about vaginal blood plasma
Stranger: HAHAHA
You: You find my face funny?
You: Jerk...
Stranger:
www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_qpX0-1QigOg/RYoDjpKqjpI/AAAAAAAAABg/EAP-iJZg-dw/s320/batman-toys-mainpic.jpg&imgrefurl=http://cyclopesgift.blogspot.com/2006/12/batman-ate-my-vagina.html&usg=__erWduweB6zO6IWzlDs3VZGYAPEc=&h=225&w=217&sz=10&hl=en&start=0&zoom=1&tbnid=XVzD3lIN7cwgQM:&tbnh=136&tbnw=131&ei=yockTtaiDqnA0AHuzuTfAw&prev=/search%3Fq%3Dbatman%2Bvagina%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN%26biw%3D1024%26bih%3D677%26tbm%3Disch&um=1&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=784&vpy=234&dur=355&hovh=180&hovw=173&tx=136&ty=79&page=1&ndsp=24&ved=1t:429,r:11,s:0&biw=1024&bih=677
Stranger: i do not approve
Stranger: ...
You: One short link you have there.
Stranger: about the size of my weenier
You: That's hot.
Stranger: and by weenier i mean my hot dog that i just put onions and relish and mustard on
Stranger: COOKOUT RULES!
You: And by hot I mean its temperature is high.
You: I'm a mother lover.
Stranger: shit like 1231 Celsius
You: You're a mother lover.
You: We should fuck eachothers mothers, fuck eachothers MOMS.
Stranger: its friday friday
You: It would be my honor, to be your new step father.
Stranger: gotta get down on friday
You: ...
You: I lost all respect for you.
Stranger: hahah
Stranger: i did along time ago
You: For you or me?
Stranger: both
You: Oh.
You: Good.
Stranger: agreed
Stranger: youz a funny man. im glad we talked
You: Thanks hun.
Stranger: you havnt asked me for noodz yet
Stranger: DONT!
You: I'm not that kind of person.
You: I wait until the second date.
Stranger: i better get a big ass steak befor hang
Stranger: hand*
Stranger: and by steak...
Stranger: i mean new york strip
You: New York strip? I hate those Yanks.
Stranger: fuck A right bo! FORD TRUCKS AND COPENHANGEN!
You: Phillies!
Stranger: ehhhhh.....
You:
You: You forgot weed.
You: And mountain dew and cigarettes
Stranger: we got shit weed here
You: Jamacian Import mah nigga.
Stranger: jamacianimport.com/weed?
You: Can't beat Jamaica.
You: Coolest accents in the god damn world.
You: Pen Island?
Stranger: hahah i liked the weed in the bahamas personally
Stranger: nassau. those are some dirty mother fuckers. but some got some good shitt
You: Wait dirty? Those are Mexicans.
Stranger: mexicans of black people i geuss.
You: Black people aren't dirty.
You: Unless you look closely
Stranger: mexicans arnt either
Stranger: theres dirty ass americans
Stranger: like myself
You: Will you
www.fillmywetstinkyholewithyourlog.com/You: Please?
You: Tosh is my hero <3
Stranger: my balls smell like cow dung and rodeo cheese burgerz from burger king
You: Rodeo cheese burgers huh? That's the shit mah man.
Stranger: love em
You: Not as good as the Chili Cheese Coney.
Stranger: from sonic?!
Stranger: i dunno dude.
You: MURKAH!
Stranger: double stackers are my shit right now
Stranger: with onions rings on the side
You: White Castle...
You: White Castle sliders make me ejaculate.
Stranger: i think the closest one to me is in PA
You: Same.
Stranger: which is a good 10 hours
You: Wait no.
You: The closest one is in Cherry Hill, where Harold & Kumar got theirs!
Stranger: hahaha
Stranger: NPH there>
You: NPH is out fucking bitches in Texas.
Stranger: snorting coke
You: Contrary to popular belief, he didn't die from that shotgun.
Stranger: NPH cant die
You: It just gave him a boner.
Stranger: he was on broadway the next weekend
Stranger: fucking all sorta bitches
You: Like H-Dawg
You: He fucked H-Dawg.
You: Did you hear about that?
You: I recorded the video.
Stranger: NO SHIT!
You: Yeah shit!
Stranger: myspace me that shit. my name suckedtomsdick69
You: MySpace is for quitters.
You: You should talk to me on XBox. I'm KongRulesAll.
Stranger: myspace if for drug addicts that just got out of prison and missed the facebook twitter google + phase
Stranger: which hopefully will be over soon
Stranger: fucking kangeroos
You: Google phase?
You: Google will always be there.
You: Google is my best friend
Stranger: it finds the best underage porn
You: It so does.
You: All you have to type in is 12 year old fu- *shot by FBI*
You: Ow.
You: God dammit FBI, that hurt.
Stranger: hahaha
Stranger: If the above message says you have been reported to the FBI, it is not legitimate. Please ignore it.
If the above message says you have been reported to the FBI, it is not legitimate. Please ignore it.
You: LOL wtf
Stranger: there watching us
You: That was hilarious.
You: Does the same thing pop up for CIA? It should
Stranger: nope. nothing.
Stranger: ATF
You: Damn. Only the FBI...
Stranger: hahah
Stranger: there we go
You: Let's try... Invisible Penguins.
You: Their messages would be invisible.
Stranger: If the above message says you have been reported to the Invisible penguins, it is not legitimate. Please ignore it.
You: Trollolol
Stranger: my llama has aarived
Stranger: peaceduuuude
You: Adios dawg.
Your conversational partner has been shot by a llama.