Post by Rai Chiller on Apr 20, 2013 21:15:28 GMT -6
Character Name: Guy Blackwell
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Birthplace: Laguna Hills, California
Physical Appearance (Photo or description):
Guy is a handsome motherfucker. Every woman swoons for him, every man is jealous of him, and every video game fan wants his head mounted on their wall. But we'll get to that later. He generally wears fashionable retro suit vests and sometimes wears those douchey Kanye sunglasses sometimes.
Good, Evil, or Neutral: Good-ish
Strengths: Guy is pretty charismatic, albeit vain in his desire to be loved by everyone. He lifts, bro. So he can swing a bat pretty hard. He can run and jump like any fit person, and isn't afraid to run away if the situation looks hopeless.
Weaknesses: He runs like a bitch if the situation looks hopeless. He isn't good at unchoreographed fight sequences, and lets the special effect people aim for him. He's not the most agile person, nor the most reasonable. He think he's better at fighting zombies than he really is. He's also a vain asshole if he isn't hiding behind his charade of suave everyman. He's not incredibly intelligent, but you knew that.
Weapon Of Choice (Within reason): Stagelight
Personality: Snarky everyman whom everyone despises and likes at the same time. You hate being with them, but you can't help but want to be with them. He's not very brave but he's willing to make friends with people, so long as they keep him from the "In Memoriam" slideshow at the next Oscars.
History: Born in a nice pampered community in California, Guy was destined to be a famous person! Landing several mediocre roles in his middle school plays, he soon discovered he had a talent for being handsome. After his breakthrough role as a tree in a toothpaste commercial, he was soon cast as the suave asshole smuggler in the popular Space Battle series.
He then went on to have roles as the lead character in many corny blockbuster hits, including the legendary action hero Dick Washington from the 'Try Hard' series. Guy was living the good life as a critically panned and financially secure individual living in the Los Angeles area. Who knew?
That was until the fateful day his agent signed him up for a certain filmed directed by Anders S.W Paulson. A film based off a video game known as Zombie Residence. This video game series was beloved by fans for its genuinely scary atmosphere and controls that feel like a mentally handicapped rhino riding a tank with no treads in molasses.
The movie was a success, and was somewhat faithful to the source material. In some ways, I guess. Guy was still a super famous movie star and his fans still adored him. No, it was not Zombie Residence 1 that would cause his career to spiral out of control, it was merely the vehicle for something much much worse.
September 10th, 2004. The day Zombie Residence: Requiempocalypse debuted in theaters. The day Guy's career began to take a figurative nosedive. The film released to a rottenpotatoes score of -7%, a first in the site's history. None would top it until the release of Zombie Residence: Exstankshun in 2007. Guy's agent committed suicide that year.
Guy then hired a new agent, whom signed Guy on for seven more video game adaptations, including Gears of Duty, Tomb Fucker, Immortal Fighting Annihilation, Alone in the Derp, Tomb Fucker the Porn parody, and Vampire Rain: The Movie. Guy's name as a notable celebrity faded into obscurity, and he is now at the lowest point in his career. For now, at least. It could certainly get lower.
So now Guy is in Willamette Colorado for his latest video game flopfilm known as UNDEAD MENACE. Could this movie save his career? Could it shit on it even more? Does anybody care? lolno.
Anyway he's in Willamette to research his role as a snarky photojournalist action hero caught in a zombie outbreak in Colorado. Yes, it is that big of a coincidence. No, I have no shame. Fuck you. Regardless he was at a poster signing in the mall when the outbreak happened, and everyone died. Even the two fans who actually attended the poster signing. Now Guy is on the run from the shitty undead trying to take the only thing he has left in this world: HIS LIFE (dun dun dun)
Location At Time Of Outbreak: Shitty poster signing booth in Paradise plaza.javascript:void(0);
How did you find our site?: I found it while searching for midget porn on google
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Birthplace: Laguna Hills, California
Physical Appearance (Photo or description):
Guy is a handsome motherfucker. Every woman swoons for him, every man is jealous of him, and every video game fan wants his head mounted on their wall. But we'll get to that later. He generally wears fashionable retro suit vests and sometimes wears those douchey Kanye sunglasses sometimes.
Good, Evil, or Neutral: Good-ish
Strengths: Guy is pretty charismatic, albeit vain in his desire to be loved by everyone. He lifts, bro. So he can swing a bat pretty hard. He can run and jump like any fit person, and isn't afraid to run away if the situation looks hopeless.
Weaknesses: He runs like a bitch if the situation looks hopeless. He isn't good at unchoreographed fight sequences, and lets the special effect people aim for him. He's not the most agile person, nor the most reasonable. He think he's better at fighting zombies than he really is. He's also a vain asshole if he isn't hiding behind his charade of suave everyman. He's not incredibly intelligent, but you knew that.
Weapon Of Choice (Within reason): Stagelight
Personality: Snarky everyman whom everyone despises and likes at the same time. You hate being with them, but you can't help but want to be with them. He's not very brave but he's willing to make friends with people, so long as they keep him from the "In Memoriam" slideshow at the next Oscars.
History: Born in a nice pampered community in California, Guy was destined to be a famous person! Landing several mediocre roles in his middle school plays, he soon discovered he had a talent for being handsome. After his breakthrough role as a tree in a toothpaste commercial, he was soon cast as the suave asshole smuggler in the popular Space Battle series.
He then went on to have roles as the lead character in many corny blockbuster hits, including the legendary action hero Dick Washington from the 'Try Hard' series. Guy was living the good life as a critically panned and financially secure individual living in the Los Angeles area. Who knew?
That was until the fateful day his agent signed him up for a certain filmed directed by Anders S.W Paulson. A film based off a video game known as Zombie Residence. This video game series was beloved by fans for its genuinely scary atmosphere and controls that feel like a mentally handicapped rhino riding a tank with no treads in molasses.
The movie was a success, and was somewhat faithful to the source material. In some ways, I guess. Guy was still a super famous movie star and his fans still adored him. No, it was not Zombie Residence 1 that would cause his career to spiral out of control, it was merely the vehicle for something much much worse.
September 10th, 2004. The day Zombie Residence: Requiempocalypse debuted in theaters. The day Guy's career began to take a figurative nosedive. The film released to a rottenpotatoes score of -7%, a first in the site's history. None would top it until the release of Zombie Residence: Exstankshun in 2007. Guy's agent committed suicide that year.
Guy then hired a new agent, whom signed Guy on for seven more video game adaptations, including Gears of Duty, Tomb Fucker, Immortal Fighting Annihilation, Alone in the Derp, Tomb Fucker the Porn parody, and Vampire Rain: The Movie. Guy's name as a notable celebrity faded into obscurity, and he is now at the lowest point in his career. For now, at least. It could certainly get lower.
So now Guy is in Willamette Colorado for his latest video game flopfilm known as UNDEAD MENACE. Could this movie save his career? Could it shit on it even more? Does anybody care? lolno.
Anyway he's in Willamette to research his role as a snarky photojournalist action hero caught in a zombie outbreak in Colorado. Yes, it is that big of a coincidence. No, I have no shame. Fuck you. Regardless he was at a poster signing in the mall when the outbreak happened, and everyone died. Even the two fans who actually attended the poster signing. Now Guy is on the run from the shitty undead trying to take the only thing he has left in this world: HIS LIFE (dun dun dun)
Location At Time Of Outbreak: Shitty poster signing booth in Paradise plaza.javascript:void(0);
How did you find our site?: I found it while searching for midget porn on google